Hey, girl – we get it. The world of love is complicated!

Opposites do attract, but…um…what’s that even mean? People tell you exactly who they are – but honey, you “la…la…la…la…” aren’t listening. Once you can spot miasms, you’ll know pronto if that cutie is the one who’ll give your love life a heaping tablespoon of spice.

Sweetie, don’t be an anxious Chihuahua swiping left or swiping right. Our supersecret classified miasm lowdown will let you flip on the high beams and explore, saving you time and boo-hoo Kleenex heartache.

Ehris’ courtship flubs and Velya’s head-over-heels love story will help you power up, get your own sparkle on, and let romance rule.

Stop the selfies and binge-watching. You’re beautiful and ferocious. You totally got this, gorg! Don’t. Seriously. Give. Up.